Bad Planning

I did not plan this well. Having kids when I was young seemed like a good idea. What I didn't stop to figure out though was that they would enter high school the year that I turn 40. Because having kids going into high school makes me feel old. And turning 40 makes me feel old. And combined makes me want to start looking into Home Care and Meels on Wheels. And possibly getting one of those showers that has a door and a chair.

You're only as old as you feel. Well, that's not helpful, is it? And have you ever noticed this is always said by retired and determindly cheerful people. The kind that are always so sickningly positive all the time that you know they have to be faking. The kind of people that when something unpleasant happens to them they continuously tell you how much worse it could be. "I was in a horrible accident where a piano fell on my head and broke every bone in my body and the doctor's say I will never get out of this bed again and also I have blinding migraines almost constantly from the brain damage and tubes and bags will function as every organ for the rest of my life, but it could be worse; I could've been hit with the piano bench too. Har har har"

Old age isn’t so bad if you consider the alternative. The alternative of visiting the fountain of youth and remaining young forever?

Anyway, I must go get ready for the day; I have to go buy some sensible shoes.

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Facepalm

Looks can be deceiving. Twin B has a friend. He has long, long hair, wears rock tshirts, and plays guitar in a heavy metal band. He hangs out with his band mates who are known for their badass ways and looks like a troublemaker. He is also an honour student and quite possibly the nicest boy ever. He once came over to hang with Twin B and rather than sneak out in the middle of the night or any other bad-kid habits, they played board games with me.

And this is where I learned that this kid is awful at trash talk. I'd be all "You suck!" and "I win and you lose and ha ha ha." And he'd be all "That was a really good play." and "You're really good at this game." Like he cannot say a mean thing ever even if he's kidding.

Yesterday, Twin B thought up a new witty comeback that he wanted to try out but first someone needed to insult him. He asked his friend to say something mean. And keeping in mind that this friend *cannot* be mean, he says the first thing that pops into his mind..."Your parents are dead!"

*****pause*****

"OHMYGOD! I can't believe I just said that. I'm so sorry."

Meanwhile Twin B is laughing so hard he can barely talk. 

Of all the insults to say to the one person he knows who actually has a dead parent. Oops.

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Jetsam

Our fridge was making funny noises this morning. Noises that made me think that perhaps we might have to start looking for a new fridge. Twin A said that he never liked that fridge anyway, and then  felt bad and apologized and hugged the fridge. The fridge immediately stopped making those noises. So that was weird.

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I'm well on my way to finishing that afghan. I need to knit 72 squares; I'm on 21. Go me!

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The tree in my front yard is the most beautiful tree ever invented.

Autumn

Winter

Spring



Phoning it in

This looked like fun. You should do it too.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
No. But I was almost named Candy. My parents liked to pick out multiple names and then decide between them when we were born. The deciding factor was what name we most looked like. Apparently I didn't look like I belonged in the sex trade.


2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I honestly can't remember. I'm going to a wedding in a couple weeks though; I'll probably cry there.


3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Yes. It's very readable.


4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Black Forest ham


6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Probably. If I could get me to leave the house to meet me.


8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes


9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
No. I'm pretty brave but bungee jumping just seems silly.


10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Cheerios. But I don't drink milk so I can only eat them dry.


11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
I rarely wear shoes with laces but when I do, I don't untie them. I do that thing where you step on the heal and pull your foot out.


12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
I have a tricep, so...


14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
The first think I notice is usually the thing that stands out. I'm not going to say I noticed what colour that guy's eyes were when he was wearing a bolo tie.


16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
That when a friend or family member has a problem, I can't fix it.


17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
My BFF. It's not that she's not just a phone call away; it's that those phone calls have become so rare. (And don't get me wrong, I'm not blaming her; it really is a two-way street).


19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
I work from home; my feet are bare.


21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
I like for my house to be quiet when there are no teenagers here.


22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Skin colour...duh.


23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
I can tell you what my least favourite smell is: the smell of fifteen 15- and 16-year-old lacrosse players walking past at the end of a game.


25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?
Either/Both. I'm not picky when it comes to vacations.


26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
I like hockey on tv, but my all time favourite is whatever my kids are playing.


32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The Lake House. Since the season of every show ever made has ended, I've been recording movies. In the theatre, I saw something about Snow White, but the dwarves didn't have beards so I found it confusing.


33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
orange.


34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
The only people who like winter don't live in this climate.


37. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?
Cardio.


39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
The House of Sand and Fog. I think I will accomplish the goal set out at the beginning of the year to read more than 47 books. I'm already on 39.


40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
It's a stack of paper, so a bunch of random notes and numbers that I assume I'll always know what they mean until I look back a couple of months later and think, what the hell is that?


42. FAVORITE SOUND?
Silence.


48. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?
It has green trim. It used to be orange.


50. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 50 QUESTIONS?
Well, I skipped quite a few so I guess not.

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Flotsam

Often I have a bunch of things to say but not enough about one thing to warrant an entire post. Probably you've noticed that if you've been reading for a while.

• June Awesomeness: Music, people who sing when they're happy, Jell-o, fresh sheets, finding $10 on the ground, being surprised with Crave cupcakes, "Slow Children Playing" sign.

• My kids graduated grade 9. The ceremony was last week. I'm happy to say that it only lasted an hour and a half and wasn't boring. The called up the children class by class and had entertainment in between: some girl sang about being 15, another danced, a teacher sang to his own child who was lucky (?) enough to have her dad as a teacher for the last 3 years, and a hard metal band played.

• I took my car in for an oil change yesterday. One thousand dollars and an overnight stay later... Ugh.

• A murder of crows woke me up this morning and stuck around for hours and hours making that noise that sounds like they might have bypassed that nest of baby robins and went straight for the neighbours cat. I refused to look out the window because I hate seeing the carnage and instead sat in a corner, rocking back and forth, mumbling to myself and crying, hoping they didn't notice the boys leaving for school this morning.

That's all really.

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Finishing

I love starting new projects. I love buying the supplies and planning out how it'll look in the end. I'm so excited to get started...and then this happens:

I started making this doll for my niece when she was born. The doll came with a carrying case that doubled as her bedroom and 5 sets of clothes. I thought I'd whip off a bunch of them so that when I needed a gift for a little girl I'd have something cool and special all ready to go. My niece is going into grade 7 this year, so probably she won't want this anymore.

We went to Disneyland for the boys twelfth birthday. I started working on a scrapbook as a way to keep all of our memories in one place. After many years of trying to keep up with chronological scrapbooking, I thought I might have more success with different books for sports, holidays, Christmas, and Halloween. To be fair, I do have most of the pictures organized; it's just the gluing them onto paper with stickers and fancy borders part that I haven't done.

These, one day, will be purses and bags and change purses and clutches. What you're not seeing is the seven other unfinished projects. They're all knit, just not sewn together.

One of several pairs of mittens not yet sewn together.

The most embarrassing unfinished project of all. My aunt bought this for me to do so she could hang it in her home. She bought this long before the boys were born. And it's beautiful. It's sideways here, but it's a man and woman walking on the beach. How, though, does it take one person over 15 years to finish a project?

Just so you know: this is barely scratching the surface of unfinished projects I haven't accomplished. I like to think that one day I will finish all of these things or maybe some magic elves will steal their way into my house at night and do it for me, except maybe not at night cause I'd hear them and not be able to sleep and have to get up and make them tea or something cause I'd feel guilty that they were doing my work for free except I don't drink tea and I don't have any teabags or anything so then I could only offer them water with maybe some Crystal Light or whatever but probably they only like the pink lemonade kind and I just ran out of that so I might as well finish those projects myself if they're going to be that picky. Geez.

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